It’s been a rough couple of weeks, but things have been getting better. (And on that note, MANY thanks to everyone who reached out to see how I was doing—it means a lot.)
As I wrote about last week, I’ve been having some issues with stress and general pessimism both in- and outside of my Day Job, and earlier this month I sat down and talked with my boss about it. This was a pretty big step for me—and not just because of the language barrier. Rather, it was me admitting to myself that I needed to slow down, step back, and reprioritize some aspects of my life.
This understandably involved a few changes—some big, some small, some I implemented right away, and some that were more gradual. In order from most to least significant, here’s a rundown of what changes I’ve made, why I made them, and what effects they’ve been having….
I Drastically Cut Down on Sugary Foods
In 2010 one of my creative heroes, Kevin Smith, got kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight for being too fat to fit in the seats. A few years later he lost a bunch of weight by cutting sugar out of his diet and spent the next few years talking about the benefits of a sugar-free life.
Meanwhile, I’ve spent the last few years not giving a crap about what I eat because I don’t have a problem fitting into airline seats, but I didn’t consider that eating too many sweet foods (and overeating in general) could be affecting my energy level in a negative way—mainly by causing sugar crashes, which have been leaving me with zero energy, making it more difficult to sleep and affecting my overall mood.
I started eating more sugar during the summer, initially because Toyama was hotter than the blazes of hell and ice cream provided some relief, but when things got more stressful I started scarfing down even more sugary foods as a distraction. My change in diet (and the resulting drop in energy level) happened so gradually I didn’t even notice, and made it harder to pinpoint the cause.
Fortunately, though, when I started having actual stomach problems and drastically cut down on sugary foods, my sleep problems and low energy level…basically went away. Like, after only a few days. Kind of like magic. I couldn’t believe it was that simple—and I REALLY wish I’d made the change sooner.
I Started Taking Time Off to Do Nothing
The day after I talked to my boss I came home from work, pulled a chair on to my balcony, and just sat in the afternoon sun for an hour and a half. No work, TV, no podcasts—just me and my thoughts. I can’t remember the last time I did that.
I realized that I spend a lot of time (too much time…) engaged in things, whether it’s actual work, reading, or drifting through social media land. By spending too much time engaged, I wasn’t giving myself time to just relax and think about things—preferably in comfortable surroundings. Taking more time for dedicated unwinding has comforted my addled brain and made it easier to focus while also filling me with new ideas—which in turn, is increasing my positivity.
I Got New Glasses
I last got new glasses in 2015, and by the time pandemic summer rolled around they were…pretty scratched. Like, so scratched that one fingerprint smudge would make them impossible to see out of. This had me either pulling out my lens cloth every half hour (a distraction), or, more often, gritting my teeth and baring it (a frustration). Either way, I was seeing the world as a clouded haze—which understandably made life feel bleaker.
After months of not making the time, I asked a coworker to take me to a glasses shop, where I took an eye test (in Japan an employee can do it right in the store!) and found a new pair I liked. (And by “liked” I really mean “was so similar to my old pair that no one even noticed.”) From the very first day with my new glasses everything seemed a million times brighter, and so did my outlook.
I Gave Up To-Do Lists for Two Weeks
I’ve been making To-Do lists pretty much every day since 2011, and writing one every morning has become a part of my daily work routine. It turns out that it was also becoming a stressor.
I realized that writing out To-Do lists was making me feel like I HAD to finish everything on that list before bedtime—and making me feel like a failure when I didn’t. Not finishing everything over multiple days was making me feel like I was falling further and further behind—even though I just had a little more on my plate than usual.
Because I was feeling so shitty, I stopped writing To-Do lists without even thinking about it—and instead I started jotting down things I’d done (note the past tense) on the day in question during the evening or the next day. These new lists became more of a chronicle of my achievements than a set of goals, and without the structure of daily To-Do lists I started getting things done at my own pace, in the order I naturally wanted to do them.
After two weeks of this I stopped feeling the pressure and found myself missing the organizational track that To-Do lists put me on—and the security of having tasks written down where I wouldn’t forget them. Then, the following Monday I felt rested and ready for a To-Do list again—and writing them has felt more natural ever since.
I Dialed Down My Workload…A Little
While my boss was able to reduce my classload by about 40% after our meeting, I still had a bunch of things I had to (and wanted to) get done. I took a few evenings and weekend days off to rest, but for the most part kept working as usual, just at a more reasonable pace. This meant shutting the computer off before 8:00 (for serious this time), taking the do-nothing breaks I talked about earlier, and going to bed at a reasonable time—even on weekends.
In my case, whereas a full-on break probably would have put me further behind and led to an onslaught of work when I came back, a little slowdown took a lot of the pressure off and helped me work at a better pace.
I Avoided Social Media, Including This Blog
I love this blog to death and it’s REALLY kept me on track over the years, but it’s also one more thing I have to take care of every week. Same with my random tweets and Instagram photos—they were just one more thing to do, and one more excuse to pull out the phone.
Again, suddenly deleting all my social media accounts didn’t feel necessary, but stepping away for a while was not only a natural step that freed up time for more important things, it made me feel less scatterbrained.
I Cleaned My Shithole of an Apartment
OK, so my apartment wasn’t THAT bad, but it had been a month since I’d vacuumed and longer still since I’d cleaned my shower or behind my gas range. I also hadn’t cleaned my balcony in the two years since I’d moved in, and the dirt from two years of storm runoff had been caked on pretty thick. And, now that I’d gotten new glasses, I could actually tell how filthy it all was.
I’ve talked about the therapeutic effects of cleaning before, and in my case it really does make me feel more settled and in control. Taking a weekend (about 3 hours on Saturday and 6 on Sunday) to clean my apartment wall to wall while listening to podcasts made me feel like I was in control of my life again—and headed in the right direction.
I Talked to Friends and Family About How I Was Feeling
I put this one last because I was basically talking to friends and family about how I was feeling already—I just cranked it up a notch and started reaching out more often. I also started being more honest instead of pretending things were A-OK, and in response to the usual “How’s it going?” texts it felt good to admit that, actually, things weren’t going so well. Not having to pretend anymore provided a huge wave of relief.
That’s also a big part of why I’m writing this post—not just because stress reduction’s been a big part of my life the last few weeks, but because being honest about it here feels good, and necessary.
Final Thoughts: Making Changes is Difficult, But Important
In my case, realizing that things REALLY weren’t going well made it easier to stand back and reprioritize my routine. Ideally I would have made that change earlier, but on the flip side, I also did a lot of good by not waiting longer than I did.
If you’re at a point in your life when things really aren’t going well (whatever that might look like), I encourage you to take a step back, look at the big (or small) aspects of what isn’t working, and take steps to fix them, whether those steps are temporary or permanent. In my case, I’ve needed to fix some problems in my daily routine so I could recover my energy and feel good again.
While your problems will of course look different than mine, the basic process—stepping back, figuring out what’s bringing you down, and taking action to make it better—will almost certainly look the same.