- Have you ever wanted to post online about something you were involved in but were afraid of how your job would react?
- Have you ever kept a creative project secret from your coworkers even if you could openly talk about it with everyone else?
- Do you worry that some aspect of your life outside of work clashes with your at-work persona in ways that could potentially cause a BIG problem?
All of these are feelings I’ve dealt with, and they’re a big deal.
Fear of Taking the Risk
A while back, a friend of mine was involved with a podcast where he and a few other friends bantered about nothing in particular. There wasn’t anything controversial about the podcast or about their views, but all the same my friend followed a strict rule of not mentioning where he worked or even giving his last name for fear it could lead to trouble (which is also why I’m not listing the podcast name here).
I wrote about this problem in my post about Japanese honne and tatemae and in another post about keeping your Day Job a secret online, but there’s a bigger question I haven’t tackled: What effect does all this secrecy have?
Short answer: It’s stressful. Longer answer:
After giving this matter a lot of thought, I’m pretty sure that most of these worries are needless: I doubt my friend’s work would have given a damn if they knew he podcasted with his college friends, and I highly doubt my previous employers would have seen my writing life as anything but a mild curiosity. However, because we don’t know this for sure, and because we depend on our jobs for our financial security, the thought of something happening to mess that up can definitely make us lose sleep.
To put it another way: the more we rely on our jobs for our stability, the more we’re going to worry about keeping them, since it’s scary to think about rocking that boat when you don’t have an extra dinghy.
Of course, the opposite also holds true: if you’ve got a few side hustles, a bunch of money saved, or other job prospects, it’s a whole lot easier to stand up for what’s really important to you because a potential work fallout wouldn’t be the end of the world.
In my series about my crooked former boss I talked about whether I would have called him out on his lawbreaking and lies if I hadn’t had a good chance at my current job in Japan. I like to think that in a perfect world I would have stood up for what I believed in no matter what—but if things on my end had looked less certain, I might very well have lost my nerve and kept quiet.
This raises a bigger question for every creative person out there with a Day Job: how far would you go to make your creative work a success if it meant risking your financial stability?
Secrecy is Stressful
For most of my working life I’ve followed my own version of the military’s old Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy for gays in the military when it comes to mixing creative work and paid work: for me, not mentioning my writing life has become just another thing I wouldn’t necessarily mention at work, just like I wouldn’t necessarily mention a big date I’d been on or or talk about my undying love of board games like this one if I didn’t really know the other person.
The problem is that for most of us, our creative work takes up a bigger portion of our lives and focus than board games or other hobbies, and not being open about it can feel like we’re hiding a part of who we are, like we’re putting on an act or a show.
In that sense, hiding your creative self at work belongs in the same class as hiding other kinds of secrets. Case in point: many gay people also feel the negative effects of keeping their sexuality hidden in the workplace, with one gay writer specifically recommending being open about your sexuality at work for your own well-being—and so you’ll be more productive.
While I’m DEFINITELY not saying that keeping your creative life a secret is the same as hiding your sexuality, the common fears of judgement and of losing your livelihood are worth considering.
How Might Employers View a Secret Creative Life, Anyway?
While our fears about what our bosses might think about our creative lives are often pretty vague, most of them seem grounded in a few basic principles:
You Might Have Opinions That Go Against the Company Culture
If your creative work involves politics, controversial views, anything sexual, or ESPECIALLY a critical perspective on your work culture (again I’ll plug the My Boss Was Crooked! series here…), your workplace might see you as unfit for their work environment. After all, your boss might not necessarily trust the guy who runs a bondage club on the weekends.
Side Sources of Income Could Be Seen as Distracting to Your Day Job Work
My first job in Japan required me to sign a contract specifically stating that I wouldn’t hold any other jobs while I was there. Maintaining loyalty to a single employer is a big aspect of Japanese culture, but it comes up in America too—for example, my crooked former boss didn’t want my coworkers engaging in other side businesses even if they weren’t direct competition, and he even worried that my coworkers were spending too much time on their hobbies (!).
Particularly for side hustles or creative work that brings in money, your boss might view these as competing for your time and energy—which could make you seem like a less-than-ideal worker. As an added worry, your company knowing you have a second income stream could also be a factor when it comes time for staff cuts…
Finally, People Might Think You’re Different
This is the thing that seems to come up the most—in cases where your coworkers don’t have their own creative aspirations and instead harbor more traditional ideas about how to live their lives, they might think it’s weird that you’re spending so much of your time on this other thing that isn’t work, family, or excessive consumerism.
Having other people view you as different can make you feel even more like you don’t belong, thus making your work environment even more stressful. In cases like these, keeping your secret can feel like the lesser of two evils.
Bottom Line: It’s Worth Thinking About How Open You Can Be at Work When Making Long-Term Plans
If you’re worried about what could happen if your Day Job and your creative life mixed, it’s definitely for a reason. We can always sense when other people are open to talking honestly, and if we sense that they aren’t, it’s probably a sign that we don’t belong in that work environment.
As I’ve said countless times on this blog, we all have to take work that’s not ideal to keep the bills paid, but when we’re thinking about our long-term plans, finding a place and a job where we feel comfortable and open should definitely be part of it.
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